January 05, 2007

Back from Vacation

Wow what a wonderful vacation!! It makes me sad to have to come back here, not because of the wonderful people who make me feel better about my lifestyle, but because it means I am back on the street and doing what I really hate doing!

My brother and I had a wonderful, although it was too short, of a time together. We talked until the wee hours and went out to dinner, had a WONDERFUL Christmas dinner together with all the trimmings and he even got me an MP3 player for christmas, he said for those slow times when I needed to think of something other than work.

I hated coming back home, I shouldn't even call it home, it's an apartment, a dank, lonely place where I sleep and eat, it has nothing at all homey in it and I hate it! But, I guess it's mine and the only place I have.

So, I guess I will get back to the grind, it's going to be a long, very long year, unless I can find another way to make some money. I just don't know who will hire an ex-prostitute, what skills should I put down on the resume? Great at blowjobs? UGH!

I hope you all had a wonderful holiday. It's so wonderful to be able to get together with family and spend some quality time together, to not even think of work, what you need to do when you get back, to be able to just relax and let the weights fall from your shoulders. To be able to laugh and joke and talk day and night, play games, and just have fun.

I went throught the want ads while I was at my brothers, as a matter of fact he even tried to help me write up a resume, but in the end we knew that it was going to be alot more difficult than either of us thought to get into the main stream world and get out of the streets.

The one thing I did have going for me is that I am not on drugs, I don't drink and I am really pretty intelligent. That of course doesn't help at all when trying to fill in applications or type up a resume. One day I will figure it all out, until then, I guess you will just have to put up with me for a little longer.

Happy New Year!

Lindsey

Posted by lindsey at 05:44 PM | Comments (0)

December 12, 2006

Is this for Real? Private Interview Scams or .....

I was checking out some sites today and came across one where a guy was asking the girl if she would do an interview for him, said he worked for "xyz" tv station and wanted to interview her, it would just be him and another guy with handheld cameras.

Well, I must say I have watched this tv station before and can't believe they would send out two guys so unprofessionally so I wonder if it's just a scam, it sure wreaked of two guys just wanting to get their rocks off, after all they were interviewing prostitutes and prostitute wannabes.

First of all I want to tell all those wannabes, it's not fun, it's not easy and most of all you will regret it if you get into it, there are plenty of other ways to make quick cash if you need it without spreading your legs for it!

Second, don't get into a situation you can't get out of, like with scammers who just want to get into your pants. I am sure they will come with cameras, so they can get it on video and sell it online! Worst case, you are raped and left for dead, so think real hard before you act.

This was not a life long goal for me, nor a dream of mine, fast money can get you into a world of trouble if your not careful, the best thing to do is sit down and think things through before you act on it, it might be the last thing you are able to do.

Lindsey

Posted by lindsey at 07:57 PM | Comments (0)

April 26, 2006

Prostitute bullshit cont.

In Ventura County, California cats and dogs are not allowed to have sex without a permit.

The only acceptable sexual position in Washington D.C. is the missionary-style position. Any other sexual position is considered illegal.

In Willowdale, Oregon no man may curse while having sex with his wife.

In the state of Washington there is a law against having sex with a virgin under any circumstances. (Including the wedding night).

---anon---

And in a similar manner:

1. In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death. (Like THAT makes sense.)

2. In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror.

3. Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also applies to undertakers; the sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.

4. The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation.

5. There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time... Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry. (Let's just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere else in the world that even comes close to this?)

6. In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands.!! The husband's lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired. (Ah! Justice!)

7. Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England - but only in tropical fish stores. (But of course!)

8. In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act. (Makes one shudder at the thought.)

9. In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time. (I presume this was a big enough Problem that they had to pass this law?)

10. In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only "in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises."

Posted by lindsey at 01:51 PM | Comments (0)

April 25, 2006

Bullshit things that make you go hmmmm

- Can you cry under water?

- When I was young we used to go "skinny dipping," now I just "chunky dunk."

- How important does a person have to be before they are considered
assassinated instead of just murdered?

- Since bread is square, why is sandwich meat round?

- Why do you have to "put your two cents in"...but it's only a "penny for
your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to? Taxes?

- Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were
buried in for eternity?

- How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a
good idea to put wheels on luggage?

- Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up
like every two hours?

- If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

- Why are you IN a movie, but you are ON TV?

- Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars
to look at things on the ground?

- How come we choose from just two people for President and fifty for Miss
America?

- Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you
naked anyway.

- I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose-fitting
clothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in
the first place!

- Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life, we could simply
press Ctrl Alt Delete and start all over?

- Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.

- If raising children was going to be easy, it never would have started with
something called labor!

- Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever

Posted by lindsey at 02:26 PM | Comments (0)

April 13, 2006

Something I have thought about OFTEN!

'John' Needs Operation After Hooker Bites Penis For Non-Payment
by Mitch Marconi
Apr 3, 2006

A hooker who bit her client's penis reportedly so hard that he required an operation has denied grievous bodily harm with intent, according to a report from the UK.
Prosecutor Matthew McNiff told the jury Louise Jowett carried out the attack because Brett O'Leary told her he had no additional money to dispense after already paying her for sex, reports the Cambridge News.

It was alleged that afterwards she asked O'Leary for more cash, becoming more aggressive as her requests continued. While performing a sex act on O'Leary he told her he did not have any more cash.

McNiff said she grabbed his penis and took it in her mouth and gripped it between her teeth. He said: "She bit hard. She bit very hard. This caused what Mr O'Leary described as indescribable pain."

According to McNiff, O'Leary tried to pry open Jowett's mouth with his hands while she made sounds like an animal. He pleaded with her to let go while hitting her to try to get her off.

Mr McNiff said there was a lot of blood while Mr O'Leary screamed and then ran to call emergency 999.

Posted by lindsey at 06:56 PM | Comments (0)

April 11, 2006

Just for fun

I was just browsing the net and found this story. I really enjoyed the vagina monologues and thought maybe this might be of some interest to men and women alike. Not sure how many men watched the vagina monologues but maybe you'll like this better.

Move Over Vaginas
The Bacivo Nuggets revive their original comedy show, "The Penis Soliloquies," and hope to take it on tour

By Andy Swift / Staff Writer
April 06, 2006
“Would you put down the dildo so we can get to work?” IC Comedy Club President, Marcus Terry said, attempting to regain order at a rehearsal for “The Penis Soliloquies” last Saturday.
“The Penis Soliloquies” is made up of skits and monologues that center around the relationship between men and their penises. Some penis-related issues addressed are size concerns and readjustment techniques.
“The Penis Soliloquies” was first written by the IC Comedy Club three years ago, spoofing the female-oriented “Vagina Monologues.” Rather than focus on serious issues of sexuality, the club decided to make the entire show comedic, with jokes about what many people consider to be inappropriate subjects, like STDs and masturbation.
Senior cinema and photography major, Marcus Terry, said he remembers working on the original show as a freshman and the inspiration behind it.
“We’re not really making fun of ‘The Vagina Monologues’,” Terry said. “We’re getting inspired by it. I remember seeing it as a freshman, then going back to my dorm and writing one of the show’s orgasm monologues.”
Despite the dozens of skits that make up “The Penis Soliloquies,” the show has a relatively small cast of only eight people. The group includes seniors Terry and Ashley Dulli-Thomas, freshman Chelsea Feig and alumni Andy Kleiman ’05, Logan Mosier ’05, Matt Chura ’05, Jake Serlen ’04 and Matt Zielinski ’05. The alumni created the original script for the “Soliloquies” back in 2003.
The performers call themselves the Bacivo Nuggets, and Zielinski said he remembers how that name came about.
“We wanted to come up with a throw-away word, something that wouldn’t conjure up an image in people’s minds,” he said. “We ended up going with Bacivo and then we added nuggets because we thought it would be funny.”
Monday’s revival performance of “The Penis Soliloquies” was well received by first-timers — mostly freshmen and sophomores — and even some seasoned viewers of the show. While this updated production maintained the overall humor of the original, Serlen said the show has still undergone a number of changes.
“First, we had to adapt the script to suit a cast of eight people,” Serlen said. “We also added a bunch of new scenes, including one about STDs, and a new monologue which is performed by a girl. We figured it would be good to hear a girl’s perspective on it all.”
A number of questionable props are used throughout the show, including a dildo, fresh oranges and a toy baby dressed up like a bandit — which is holding a dildo. But even more entertaining than the props are the show’s penis costumes. Several skits required cast members to play the parts of each other’s penises, demonstrating the constant struggle between the brain in a man’s head and the one in his shorts -- and how the latter almost always wins. Mosier said there is a step-by-step process in which the sensual suits are put together.
“Basically, we take boxer briefs and a wife-beater, dye them flesh-colored, and top it off with a purple swimming cap,” he said. “We’re a very classy organization.”
Senior English major, Ashley Dulli-Thomas, admitted that being one of only two girls in the cast made it a little overwhelming at first, but the fun tone of the group made it easy for her to fit in. In the show, Dulli-Thomas’ character delivers a monologue about her penis envy, ranting and raving about how she wants to have one. But Dulli-Thomas said she doesn’t actually feel this way.
“Even though they have their benefits, I don’t really wish I had a penis,” she said.
There are actually few aspects of sexuality that the show doesn’t cover in one way or another. With an anything-goes attitude, “The Penis Soliloquies” shows the funnier side of such sexual issues as STDs, masturbation and even teen pregnancy. At one point, Feig holds her character’s baby by one of its legs and smacks it against a guy in a penis costume.
Some of the more memorable sketches include the “Penis Talk” segment, where viewers get to see just what everyone’s really thinking “down there,” and “Penis Facts,” where audiences are sure to be grossed out while trying to decide if the “facts” are true or not. One fact was about a priest who lost his testicles and is now referred to as Sister Mary Ball-less. That one probably wasn’t true.
One of the biggest crowd-pleasers on Monday night was Chura’s portrayal of Christopher Walken’s penis. He rambled on about having lunch with Sharon Stone’s vagina, Walken’s views on kangaroos, and he even talked about living at Friendly’s for months at a time, eating the children that wandered under the table.
The Bacivo Nuggets hope Monday’s performance of the show was the start of a “Penis Soliloquies” campus tour. The group has sent out 100 press packets to various colleges in Pennsylvania, New York, Massachusetts area. The money made from ticket sales as well as the penis-shaped chocolates sold for concessions, will support the traveling ensemble on its collegiate journey.
“If we’re able to do all of that, we might even try to take it further and sort of become the next ‘Vagina Monologues’,” Terry said.
Overall, audiences loved “The Penis Soliloquies” for its honesty and humor. One student in attendance, freshman English major Bryan Dine, even left with a better sense of self-satisfaction.
“I’ve never been prouder to have a penis,” Dine said.
For more information on the show, visit www.thepenissoliloquies.com

Posted by lindsey at 06:48 PM | Comments (0)

December 11, 2005

Bullshit on the streets

I get so sick and tired of this bullshit! I can't stand my life and I can't stand these pervs that think about nothing but getting off! What the hell am I but a piece of meat and these pervs can't see past their dicks and where they can put them!
Excuse me for going off but seriously, this past weekend had to be the worst since I started doing this shit. I don't know what was with people but I had driveby splatterings, people throwing crap at me, yes and I do mean literally. Yelling at me calling me everything but white and yes I guess I am a whore and slut and everything they called me, but I am just trying to make ends meet and this is the only way I know how. Honestly I went back to my place and just cried myself to sleep, wishing I had never gotten into this mess, wishing I had never gone through what I went through that brought me where I am today, wishing I had taken the other fork in the road, but wishing isn't going to get me anywhere and I know that.
I know alot of you guys like reading my stories and I really do try and make them entertaining, but the bullshit I go through on a nightly bases really is alot worse than I make it out to be.
Imagine walking around every night in high heels and barely any clothes, especially on those very cold New York City nights, it's not as glamerous and it may seem.
Well, I suppose I will stop my griping now as I am sure that is not what you really want to read, so I promise my next post will be fun and exciting ;o)

Lindsey

Posted by lindsey at 01:50 PM | Comments (0)

September 26, 2005

A day in the REAL world

Most of my days are spent sleeping because I have a night job. The other night I took off and slept and then I got up the next morning to see what it's like in the real world.
My first stop was at a famous coffee place to get a capaccino, then I was off to shop. It had been a rough night, I'm not use to sleeping at night and so it didn't go to well and I needed a pick-me-up.
The coffee got me going but then I really had to go, so I stopped in a local grocery store. I needed a few groceries anyway and since they wouldn't be parishable it would work out good.
While I was in the bathroom I heard a couple girls talking about their night out and the guys they were with. It's funny, I have done just about everything but hearing these girls talk took me back to when I had first started out.
I didn't know much, and so the best I could do was to give blowjobs and get screwed. These girls were talking about the guys they had picked up at the bar and screwed the night before and they were giggling about how the one wanted a blowjob and she wouldn't give him one and so on. I almost laughed outloud listening to them talk and then I wondered, since they obviously don't know much about sex, do they know about protection?
When I got out of the bathroom I saw the girls standing there primping and started to think. They look like pretty intelligent girls, and they were very pretty, why would they go and be so stupid?
I chose what it is that I do, but at least I get paid, they are being used for sex and getting nothing out of it other than maybe a pregnancy or worse!
I opened my mouth to speak a couple times before anything actually came out. I explained that I had overheard their conversation and that I was sorry if I was intruding, but did they use protection. They gave me this weird look and started laughing, they explained that it was none of my business, but no they didn't because sex doesn't feel as good with condoms. Now it was my turn to laugh, and I said 'let me see, these guys told you that right?', they said yes they had, but they felt the same as the guys, I explained that while it MIGHT change sensation for the guy it does nothing to kill the sensation to the woman, and if they keep it up, they will not be feeling anything at all!
They looked puzzled until I mentioned aids along with all of the other STD's they could catch and IF they were as smart as I thought they were, they wouldn't let any guy use them like that again!

I don't know if they took my advice or not, or if they are still out there being stupid, all I know is that I said what needed to be said and hopefully I got through, I did my good deed for the day and now there are 2 more sexually educated women in the world.

Tomorrow, maybe I will have an even more exciting story to tell you, until then, maybe I have educated a few more of you out there. Hey, if pornstars can catch HIV why couldn't anyone else!

Lindsey

Posted by lindsey at 06:46 PM | Comments (0)

September 23, 2005

Prostitute Bullshit

No man is allowed to make love to his wife with the smell of garlic, onions, or sardines on his breath in Alexandria, Minnesota. If his wife so requests, law mandates that he must brush his teeth.
Warn your hubby that after lovemaking in Ames, Iowa, he isn't allowed to take more than three gulps of beer while lying in bed with you-or holding you in his arms.

Bozeman, Montana, has a law that bans all sexual activity between members of the opposite sex in the front yard of a home after sundown-if they're nude. (Apparently, if you wear socks, you're safe from the law!)

During lunch breaks in Carlsbad, New Mexico no couple should engage in a sexual act while parked in their vehicle, unless their car has curtains.

In Cleveland, Ohio women are not allowed to wear patent-leather shoes.

Clinton, Oklahoma has a law against masturbating while watching two people having sex in a car.

It's safe to make love while parked in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho. Police officers aren't allowed to walk up and knock on the window. Any suspicious officer who thinks that sex is taking place must drive up from behind, honk his horn three times and wait approximately two minutes before getting out of his car to investigate. [Hmmm... okay, there's one place with a law that makes sense... -psl]

In Connorsville, Wisconsin no man shall shoot off a gun while his female partner is having a sexual orgasm.

In Detroit, couples are not allowed to make love in an automobile unless the act takes place while the vehicle is parked on the couple's own property.

A law in Fairbanks, Alaska does not allow moose to have sex on city streets.

In Florida it is illegal for single, divorced, or widowed women to parachute on Sunday afternoons.

In Harrisburg, Pennsylvania it is illegal to have sex with a truck driver inside a toll booth.

The owner of every hotel in Hastings, Nebraska, is required to provide each guest with a clean and pressed nightshirt. No couple, even if they are married, may sleep together in the nude. Nor may they have sex unless they are wearing one of these clean, white cotton nightshirts.

Another law in Helena, Montana, mandates that a woman can't dance on a table in a saloon or bar unless she has on at least three pounds, two ounces of clothing.

A state law in Illinois mandates that all bachelors should be called master, not mister, when addressed by their female counterparts.

An excerpt from brilliant Kentucky state legislation. "No female shall appear in a bathing suit on any highway within this state unless she be escorted by at least two officers or unless she be armed with a club".

The following important amendment however is to be considered here: "The provisions of this statute shall not apply to females weighing less than 90 pounds nor exceeding 200 pounds, nor shall it apply to male horses."

In Kingsville, Texas there is a law against two pigs having sex on the city's airport property.

Any couple making out inside a vehicle, and accidentally sounding the horn during their lustful act, may be taken to jail according to a Liberty Corner, New Jersey law.

In Los Angeles, California, a man is legally entitled to beat his wife with a leather belt or strap, but the belt can't be wider than 2 inches, unless he has his wife's consent to beat her with a wider strap. Consent should be given prior to the event, as is carefully stipulated. [Not to be confused with the myth about "rule of thumb"'s origin -psl]

In Maryville, Missouri, women are prohibited from wearing corsets because "The privilege of admiring the curvaceous, unencumbered body of a young woman should not be denied to the normal, red-blooded American male."

In Michigan, a woman isn't allowed to cut her own hair without her husband's permission.

In Nevada sex without a condom is considered illegal.

An ordinance in Newcastle, Wyoming, specifically bans couples from having sex while standing inside a store's walk-in meat freezer!

In Norfolk, Virginia, a woman can't go out without wearing a corset. (There was a civil-service job-for men only-called a corset inspector.)

In Oblong, Illinois, it's punishable by law to make love while hunting or fishing on your wedding day.

In Oxford, Ohio, it's illegal for a woman to strip off her clothing while standing in front of a man's picture.

In hotels in Sioux Falls, South Dakota, every room is required to have twin beds. And the beds must always be a minimum of two feet apart when a couple rents a room for only one night. And it's illegal to make love on the floor between the beds!

A Tremonton, Utah law states that no woman is allowed to have sex with a man while riding in an ambulance. In addition to normal charges, the woman's name will be published in the local newspaper. The man does not receive any punishment.

Utah state legislation outlaws all sex with anyone but your spouse. Next to that adultery, oral and anal sex, masturbation are considered sodomy and can lead to imprisonment. Sex with an animal - unless performed for profit - however is NOT considered sodomy. Polygamy - provided only the missionary position has been applied - is only a misdemeanor.

Very interesting stuff and more to come!

Lindsey

Posted by lindsey at 01:35 PM | Comments (0)

August 31, 2005

Can Prostitutes be Raped?

That's what I am asking myself today. I wasn't sure if I should report it, wondering if they would even believe me or would laugh me out of the police station.

I decided to take my chances and went in. I was surprised that, even though they know me there as a prostitute, they did take me seriously and called in their rape specialist and counselor.

It seemed that I wasn't the first to come in, and that there was some serial rapist that gets his jolly's out of raping prostitutes. I was the third worker in a week to come in. I really was glad that I reported it, maybe we could get this asshole off the streets! At least they were putting the word out to all us working girls to be on the lookout.

They took my statement, got some information they hadn't from the other girls and thought they knew who the guy was. I had been lucky enough to see a scar on his right cheek. He had a black mask over his face but when he threw me down and I fought back I was able to pull it off that much. I also noticed he had piercing blue eyes and blonde eyelashes.

I was shocked that this happened, not just to me but to 3 other girls, and I hadn't heard word of it, although usually this type of thing the girls keep to themselves and it's usually the cops that let us know that someone like this is on the prowl.

I am ok, for those that are wondering. He didn't beat me too bad, nor did he try and hurt me too bad. I fought for awhile and then realized it was useless and once I stopped fighting he did what he wanted and then took off. What amazes me is that nobody, absolutely nobody heard or saw anything, even though I know there were some people close to where I was raped.

Lindsey

related info-Prostitution

Posted by lindsey at 03:13 PM | Comments (0)

August 06, 2005

Fucking Sister

The title says it all here, my sister is a real bitch, always causing me problems. Thanks to her I dont have time to post much today. She got her self in trouble again and as always I have to bail her out. I'll tell you the whole story as soon as I can. In the mean time, here's some cool Vintage Pictures and movies. I dont know why, but this type of porn gets me wet, maybe because it was so taboo back then, yet people did it.

Sorry so short today.

Lindsey

Posted by lindsey at 05:32 PM | Comments (0)